Experiencing Joy and Peace

Dear Marcia, 

When I think of what you mean to me, Marcia, and the impact you  have had on my life, two stories come to mind. They both have to do with my husband, Howie, who died six years ago. So in a sense,  this appreciation of you is as much on his behalf as it is from me. 

We first met you and Jack at a Havurah Institute many years ago.  It was our first Institute. On Shabbos morning we had a choice  of 4 services, and chose yours. It was the first time I remember experiencing joy in a service, and it blew me away. I remember there was a basket of rhythm instruments; I picked up one of them and joined in with  the music and celebration. It was my introduction to Jewish Renewal, and I had  never seen anything like it. 

Afterward we came up and introduced ourselves, saying we knew you  lived in Philadelphia and asking you if you lead services somewhere we  could go. You told us about P’nai Or; all it took was one visit there  for us to be hooked. When we joined you for the High Holidays, remember Howie saying that this was the first time in his life that  he had ever looked forward to Yom Kippur.

The second story is a more somber one, from the end of Howie’s life. He chose you to lead his memorial service. He had very few requests  for the content of the service, but was clear about who was to lead it.  During the time when he and I both knew he was  dying, I asked him from time to time who he wanted to see. If someone called or sent an e-mail message, I would convey their greetings to Howie and ask him if he wanted to see or talk to them. I also tried to think of all the people who I knew were important in Howie’s life and ask him if he wanted to see or talk to them. In some cases he did,  and some he didn’t. There was  only one person whom he specifically requested  to see without any  prompting from me, and that was you. I remember your visit to himvividly, and think it helped him find peace. 

The memorial service you and Jack later led was amazing. One  friend (Gentile) said she could listen to you for hours. Another friend  (also Gentile) told me later that she had intended to leave right after the service because she had a lot of work to do, but there was so much  love and warmth in that room that she just wanted to stay and stay.

  

I am profoundly grateful that you are in my life.

Much love,

Sheela